Gabez in fan-fic shocker
It was to be just another fan art upload, but a quick error with the mouse would have fatal consequences for the prolific TSB writer. "I've made a huge mistake," admits Gabez, visibly embarrassed. "I wanted to beat World of Monkey Island to the punch, and must have hit a wrong button, and ended up uploading my extensive fanfic collection instead. I am so, so sorry."
Instead of uploading the latest Neil Joshi masterpiece, Gabez, a vocal opponent of fan-fiction, populated the server with novels like "Rebellion: The Last Rebel", "Stan's Pre-Used Adventure", and "The Sovereign of Monkey Island".
"I was shocked," states a visibly shaken bgbennyboy, who first noticed the upload mistake. "He always seemed so laidback and stable, but now... I have to question everything." A week's salary was docked from Gabez's paycheck to make an example of this unheard of behavior. "It'll be hard," laments Gabez, "but I deserve it."
Update: one of Gabez's smutty stories can be found below. Be warned, though, it's not reading for the faint hearted...
(APRIL FOOLS JOKE)MONKEY ISLAND 5: MY LIFE AS A POO
By Gabez
Note from the author: this is PRIVATE! It's not FINISHED YET but I MAY send it TO the LUCAS ARTS when it's FINISHED. But ONLY THEN. It is a WORK in PROGRESS. Thank you.
'Elaine', groaned Guybrush softly 'Elaine!!!' Guybrush was stuck underneath a cliff at the end of Escape from Monkey Island. If you didn't already know Escape from Monkey Island was a Monkey Island graphic adventure and was made by Ron Gilbert who is my favourite Monkey Island maker ever, except Bill Tiller, who did the art for another Monkey Island misadventure, is another good artist, and will be shortly listed on a SCUMM Bar comic adventure some time in the future so stay tuned folks!!
Anyway Guybrush was stuck underneath the cliff and he had nothing but his sword to save him! 'Oh yeah' moaned Guybrush in ecstasy. 'I could just use my sword'. 'Let's not quibble here, Guybrush' barked LeChuck. So Guybrush was underneath the cliff with just his sword and LeChuck. Wait ' LeChuck? OH-OH!
END OF PART ONE
-----------------------
PART TWO
'But but but but but but LECHUCK!' said Guybrush earnestly. 'Aye', said he, 'But you'll be wanting a grog before I spiddle your widdle'. 'WHAT' sighed Guybrush. So the handsome duo quaffed potions of Grog before they began it. 'I mean I was blown free from the stupid Monkey Island statue' groaned LeChuck. 'But I thought' said Guybrush but LeChuck was two steps in front of him and five steps behind already; he had placed a green finger on Guybrush's soft lips before he could moan another syllable! 'It is not the secret of Monkey Island', whispered LeChuck huskily in Guybrush's ear. 'That was just a misadventure to keep you occupied'. 'What you mean', asked Guybrush pensively, but LeChuck was already gone in a puff of smoke! OH NO! Then Guybrush died.
END OF PART TWO
-----------------------
PART THREE
Guybrush eventually died but before he did he was saved by Elaine Threepwood Marley who came down on a rope like at the end of Monkey Island 2. 'Well well well well Guybrush Thriftweed' 'Threepweed!' said Guybrush 'I mean Threepwood!' 'You do turn up into the strangest places!' But then Guybrush realized that it was not Elaine at all but STAN the used water seller from Monkey Island 1: the secret of Monkey Island 2. 'I am not Elaine at all!' quaked Stan. 'I am but in an original Elaine costume! I am selling costumes now! That is what I am doing in Monkey Island 5!'
Guybruhs groaned heavily: 'maybe you could do without getting me on?' he joked. 'Of course!' Stan replied, strapping himself in. Before Guybrush could utter another word they were strapped on and flying fast! 'So this is what the Carrybeen looks like from the air' remarked Guybrush, spitting! 'Yes' said Stan.
Meanwhile in LeChuck's fortress the evil genius was busy contracting a doomsday device like at the end of Monkey Island 1! 'I have them now' he cackled, drinking the root beer that Guybrush used against him in Monkey Island 1! JUST THEN the window smashed open and a GHOST came through. 'Ah Dad' whimpered LeChuck, 'I have been expecting you'. 'Billions of blue blistering barnacles in ten thousand thundering typhoons!' whispered LeChuck's Dad, LeBuck. 'What did you want with me here?'
'I have to admit', said Guybrush like a sheep 'I have no money' 'WHAT' yelped Stan the used salesman. Stan dropped Guybrush because he didn't have any money. OH NO!
END OF PART FOUR
-----------------------
PART FIVE
'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo' yelled Guybrush as he tumbled down to Earth! 'Oh poo' joked Stan because he had dropped Guybrush! JUST THEN the Voodoo Priestess God heard Stan and thought HE said 'Make Guybrush into a poo!'. So the Voodoo Lady made Guybrush into a poo! 'Oh poo' joked Guybrush when he realised he had turned into a poo. 'At least I won't die because all this poo has cushioned by fall'. 'OH NO' sighed Elaine as she saw Guybrush was a poo. 'LOOKS LIKE THE HONEYMOONS OVER' she screamed.
Instead of uploading the latest Neil Joshi masterpiece, Gabez, a vocal opponent of fan-fiction, populated the server with novels like "Rebellion: The Last Rebel", "Stan's Pre-Used Adventure", and "The Sovereign of Monkey Island".
"I was shocked," states a visibly shaken bgbennyboy, who first noticed the upload mistake. "He always seemed so laidback and stable, but now... I have to question everything." A week's salary was docked from Gabez's paycheck to make an example of this unheard of behavior. "It'll be hard," laments Gabez, "but I deserve it."
Update: one of Gabez's smutty stories can be found below. Be warned, though, it's not reading for the faint hearted...
(APRIL FOOLS JOKE)MONKEY ISLAND 5: MY LIFE AS A POO
By Gabez
Note from the author: this is PRIVATE! It's not FINISHED YET but I MAY send it TO the LUCAS ARTS when it's FINISHED. But ONLY THEN. It is a WORK in PROGRESS. Thank you.
'Elaine', groaned Guybrush softly 'Elaine!!!' Guybrush was stuck underneath a cliff at the end of Escape from Monkey Island. If you didn't already know Escape from Monkey Island was a Monkey Island graphic adventure and was made by Ron Gilbert who is my favourite Monkey Island maker ever, except Bill Tiller, who did the art for another Monkey Island misadventure, is another good artist, and will be shortly listed on a SCUMM Bar comic adventure some time in the future so stay tuned folks!!
Anyway Guybrush was stuck underneath the cliff and he had nothing but his sword to save him! 'Oh yeah' moaned Guybrush in ecstasy. 'I could just use my sword'. 'Let's not quibble here, Guybrush' barked LeChuck. So Guybrush was underneath the cliff with just his sword and LeChuck. Wait ' LeChuck? OH-OH!
END OF PART ONE
-----------------------
PART TWO
'But but but but but but LECHUCK!' said Guybrush earnestly. 'Aye', said he, 'But you'll be wanting a grog before I spiddle your widdle'. 'WHAT' sighed Guybrush. So the handsome duo quaffed potions of Grog before they began it. 'I mean I was blown free from the stupid Monkey Island statue' groaned LeChuck. 'But I thought' said Guybrush but LeChuck was two steps in front of him and five steps behind already; he had placed a green finger on Guybrush's soft lips before he could moan another syllable! 'It is not the secret of Monkey Island', whispered LeChuck huskily in Guybrush's ear. 'That was just a misadventure to keep you occupied'. 'What you mean', asked Guybrush pensively, but LeChuck was already gone in a puff of smoke! OH NO! Then Guybrush died.
END OF PART TWO
-----------------------
PART THREE
Guybrush eventually died but before he did he was saved by Elaine Threepwood Marley who came down on a rope like at the end of Monkey Island 2. 'Well well well well Guybrush Thriftweed' 'Threepweed!' said Guybrush 'I mean Threepwood!' 'You do turn up into the strangest places!' But then Guybrush realized that it was not Elaine at all but STAN the used water seller from Monkey Island 1: the secret of Monkey Island 2. 'I am not Elaine at all!' quaked Stan. 'I am but in an original Elaine costume! I am selling costumes now! That is what I am doing in Monkey Island 5!'
Guybruhs groaned heavily: 'maybe you could do without getting me on?' he joked. 'Of course!' Stan replied, strapping himself in. Before Guybrush could utter another word they were strapped on and flying fast! 'So this is what the Carrybeen looks like from the air' remarked Guybrush, spitting! 'Yes' said Stan.
Meanwhile in LeChuck's fortress the evil genius was busy contracting a doomsday device like at the end of Monkey Island 1! 'I have them now' he cackled, drinking the root beer that Guybrush used against him in Monkey Island 1! JUST THEN the window smashed open and a GHOST came through. 'Ah Dad' whimpered LeChuck, 'I have been expecting you'. 'Billions of blue blistering barnacles in ten thousand thundering typhoons!' whispered LeChuck's Dad, LeBuck. 'What did you want with me here?'
'I have to admit', said Guybrush like a sheep 'I have no money' 'WHAT' yelped Stan the used salesman. Stan dropped Guybrush because he didn't have any money. OH NO!
END OF PART FOUR
-----------------------
PART FIVE
'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo' yelled Guybrush as he tumbled down to Earth! 'Oh poo' joked Stan because he had dropped Guybrush! JUST THEN the Voodoo Priestess God heard Stan and thought HE said 'Make Guybrush into a poo!'. So the Voodoo Lady made Guybrush into a poo! 'Oh poo' joked Guybrush when he realised he had turned into a poo. 'At least I won't die because all this poo has cushioned by fall'. 'OH NO' sighed Elaine as she saw Guybrush was a poo. 'LOOKS LIKE THE HONEYMOONS OVER' she screamed.